Well I book rooms and I am a weekend comic, and I am glad to say I am doing 3 or 4 paid gigs a month. Not a lot, but just what I want to be doing. I have a good day job with good benifits so I am just in it to have a good time, give the folks a good laugh and make some fun money. As a booker I am up front, I tell you what the gig pays and the demo of the room. I usually won’t ask a comic unless they are a good fit. My rooms have been successful for a reason. Now as a comic I expect the same thing from who ever is asking me to do a show. I want them to tell me, what the room is like, how much I time and $$ will be getting, and any other details, whether blue is ok, or expected or they want a PG13 show. In this day of $4 gas, sometimes the drive won’t make much economic sense. If they money does not work, don’t be afraid to be upfront about it. Nothing is worse than hearing a comic bitch about the drive and how he “can’t make any money”…well just tell me “No” it really won’t hurt my feelings. I understand. And …if you take a gig, honor it, the other thing that pisses me off is getting a call 2 weeks before a show after the posters have been printed and hearing…”Dude…um…I can’t make your show, I got a gig closer and it pays better”…Really! Great! But I asked you first you SOB, so forget about being booked again. Oh and as a comic…avoid any and all bringer shows…that just shows you the booker/promoter is either in the wrong room or won’t work to promote the show. I think as a comic you should be promoting the show as much as you can. But you should not be required to have 5 people pay $7 then get 3 menu items. I think if ALL us comics refused to do bringer shows, those guys running them would get the idea. Also as a promoter, be honest, don’t over sell the talents of the comics you are booking…if you say X is selling out rooms in NYC and he or she sucks…not has a bad night…but sucks…well the venue owner will question your ability to spot talent. And as a comic, yea we may all bull shit, but come on…do not say you were on Comedy Central or BET unless you really were. People really don’t care, but it will be obvious if you are not that good. Like anything else in life, don’t be an ass hole, treat people well and they will do the same. AS a comic, treat the wait staff at the venue well. if you are getting a free meal…don’t forget to TIP THEM…maybe tip them double as you didn’t have to pay for the food. AS a booker, treat the comics well, don’t be a post set critic that night, if they bombed they know it. Pay the comics what you agreed to, and if you can, maybe pay them a little more if they really killed it. Also pay them promptly, I know sometimes you have to wait to get paid by the venue. Oh and if you are a booker and you dick someone…well you dicked us all…because by the end of the weekend…every comic in the area will know you dicked someone. So be honest and up front, don’t be an asshole, and don’t dick anyone and we all will be happy.

I am thinking of getting the Nick at Nite people, the Animal Planet people and the A&E folks together for a new show...loosely based on the 70's TV Show BJ and the Bear. It will be called BJ from a Bear. And what it will be is a group of guys high on PCP go into the woods and try to get a BJ from a bear.

New Holiday

Trayvon Martin Luther King Jr Day.

On this day we celebrate that great American Trayvon Martin Luther King Jr. by the traditional meal of Skittles and iced tea while we smoke weed and watch the NBA All Star game in our hoodies.

Damn those facts...

http://miami.cbslocal.com/2012/03/26/pot-blamed-for-trayvon-martins-suspension/

SO now the family is mad that the media found out the truth? Every day they get just a little more rope to hang themselves with. No wonder they wanted to lynch Mr. Zimmerman so quick...dead men tell no tales. Mr Zimmerman is this decades Richard Jewell. Hell I bet Mr. Zimmerman actually saved some lives that day, with the direction Martin's life was headed.

My healthcare reform plan.

I originally wrote this in May of 2009...not much has changed...I still think it is better that what Obama gave us.

Dad always preached to his 5 sons, KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid), and that is what can be done with heath reform. So here is my plan, I have no degree just 41 years of common sense. (now 44)

1) End state regulation of Health Insurance; make a universal national standard all companies must follow. As it is now each of the 50 states have their own standards and if you live in PA you can only buy a policy that is from a company in PA. So costs vary from state to state.
2) Create a “free” market for the sale of health insurance. End the practice of the employer buying the policy for us. Instead create a system like the 401K were the employer contributes to an account that we then use to help fund the policy we buy.
3) Give credit for healthy activities. If you belong to a gym or a sports club you get a discount. All smoking succession programs and classes should be free, funded by the taxes ALREADY collected from cigarettes.
4) Create the National Health Service. The National Health Service will consist of a University just like the Naval Academy or West Point. For the promise of service we will train doctors and all ranges of medical specialist from LPNs to Radiologists, to Brian Surgeons. These will be used to staff National Clinics and Hospitals in the poorest areas of the country. But each congressional district will have at least one clinic. The idea is to provide a safety net not a primary care for everyone. Anyone can use the services but they may have to pay if they have insurance already.
5) The employer’s contribution the Health Savings Account and the citizen’s payment to the health insurance will be made using pre tax dollars like now. However if you make under $75K 100% of your contribution will be 100% tax deductable.
6) The funding for all these things will be done in part by closing the tax loop holes that allow companies to be incorporated off shore, and allow private citizens to funnel money into off shore tax havens.
7) End all TV and print ads for both lawyers and medical services and drugs that are not over the counter.
8) Tort reform- Enact a loser pays system, also limit the amount of punitive damages to $1 Million in a life time per person. Compensatory damages will be awarded by a board of made up of physicians and medical providers not by a room full of lawyers.

9) Schools would be used as free community fitness centers and phys-ed would be as important as reading and math.

Well that is 9 things and takes less than a page. Sure I may have missed some things but it is a start

Trayvon's Tweets

Wow...he was such an angel. And check his Twitter name...Why do I feel the more we know about him, the less sympathetic people will become. And why it the media using a 5 year old photo when there are plenty of current ones available?

http://www.scribd.com/doc/86809463/Trayvon-s-Tweets-the-Daily-Caller

Bobby Brown arrested for DUI...Shocking!

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/2012/03/26/us/ap-us-people-bobby-brown-.html?_r=2&ref=news

"Los Angeles police say Brown was released from jail on his own recognizance shortly before 2 p.m."...That should have been enough to keep him. And by suspicion they mean he pissed black tar heroin and shit crack. I am sure Bobby Brown will provide months of enjoyment before he dies of a drug overdose. 

Could the Marshall Plan really have hurt Europe, causing the problems of today?

(This was written by me in May of 2010, and it still holds true...)

 One day a while back I got to talking with one of my customers. His name is Tom he is Greek and he owns a restaurant in Lancaster, PA. He is 74 (i think) and works every day, usually in a dress shirt and tie even though I see him in the kitchen getting the food started or cutting meat. 

I asked him, why is it he still works hard every day, but if he lived in Greece he would have retired at 54 and got 90% pension. Well...it was like I poked him with a stick. For the next 20 minutes he gave me a really interesting lecture that well I never though of before. Between the wars there was a great migration of what he called the "Entrepreneur and Working Class" out of Western Europe. Most of them went to the US, Canada, Argentina, and Australia. After the Second World War the Marshall Plan went into effect to help Europe recover from the devastation of the war, and to prevent Communism from taking over the west. But instead of being a building block to rebuild Europe, it became a hand out. The Entrepreneur Class was gone and there was nothing to fill the void except government. This was the birth of the Nanny State across Europe. The governments took over what private industry should have done. To keep the people happy they just gave away what they could, with birthrates on the rise they knew the next generation would be able to foot the bill. The people got used to getting a lot of somethings for a little nothings, there was also some guilt from the older generations to make sure the younger generations do not have to suffer as they did. So the more Uncle Sam gave the more they took and gave away. In essence because they (Europe/Greece) did not have the do or die mentality because that class was gone and they did not really have the need since Uncle Sam was holding the safety net they created entire nations of folks who thought they were entitled to XYZ because they suffered through the wars. They of course gave birth to kids who wanted even more, like free universal health care, free collage education, retirement at 54, 6 to 8 week vacation, 52-100 weeks of PAID maternity leave, and the list goes on. Eventually reaching the point were their is no incentive to work because the government will take care of all your needs. Well eventually it all comes crashing down. The support (taxed) population decreases to a point were the cash is not there for the programs the people feel they are entitled to...and well BOOM! He believes that if Europe would have been allowed to recover on its own with little or limited US backing that it would have been stronger in the long run, because you would not have had the explosion of the entitlement class, and you would have had developed a new entrepreneur class to replace the one that left between the wars. Is he right? Well he sure made a good argument. And he had a butcher knife in his hand the entire time to I was not going to challenge him. But I think he hit on something that most never thought of. 

Obama's green aircraft initiative

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2012/03/23/45-foot-long-paper-airplane-soars-over-arizona-desert/

Obama's next green transportation program. Algore Air will receive $500 Billion this year..."This is how America will lead the world in green aircraft technology"-Barack 0bama---ok not really.

I know most of the spring sports have gotten underway, but you can do this in the fall. If you are a coach of an U10 team...and it does not matter what sport. When you have your player draft...pick the kids with the hottest moms. And you can be creative...have a theme...big boobs, blonds, single mom's, nice legs...what ever really. Because face it, the season will get long...at least you will have something nice to look at.

Stay Classy Spike!

http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Hollywood/2012/03/25/Spike-Lee-Does-the-Wrong-Thing

Ok...this is getting just a wee bit crazy... Spike Lee famous for being a fan of the New York Knicks has thought it was a good idea to publish the home address of George Zimmerman. Now remember those peaceful members of the New Black Party have decided to offer $10K for some one to "capture" Mr. Zimmerman...sorta like a run away slave. I wonder if those good folks at the New Black Panthers offer $10K for every one that shoots a black person, or just when it is a non 100% black person. The media is loath to report that Mr. Zimmerman is of mixed race...just like our President. I love the irony that the same people that are into the "Stop Snitchin'" movement, are all for some one "snitchin'" on Mr. Zimmerman... Oh and here is a few addresses for Mr. Lee... 124 Dekalb Ave, 2nd Fl, Brooklyn, NY 11217, or here  55 Washington in Brooklyn Heights and he likes to hang out at the Starbucks on the corner of Main St in the DUMBO section of Brooklyn Heights as well. I am sure he would just love a visit. 

Master of the obvious...

http://dailycaller.com/2012/03/26/former-naacp-leader-accuses-sharpton-and-jackson-of-exploiting-trayvon-martin/

Sharpton and Jackson have taken blaxploitation to a new level. They are Shaft...but with out the honor and the moral code. I am glad to see someone from the NAACP calling them out on it. There are 3 things in this world we can count on...death, taxes and Jessie and Al will create racial division when ever they can. They are Harold Hill and PT Barnum of the race hustling kind.

What is an 80 something doing going into an Apple Store anyway?

http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2012/03/25/octegenarian-sues-apple-for-collision-related-injury/ 



What made it worse...she spilled her hot coffee she got from McDonald's all over her. I think the glass doors are just a test for Apple. If you are to stupid to notice a glass door...you are not smart enough to use anything in the store...even the bathroom. I bet this lady thought they sold apples...the fruit.

Black Panther Bounty and hiding race when it suites the agenda.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/black-panther-rage-10g-capture-trayvon-killer-article-1.1050370

"The new Black Panther Party offered a bounty of $10,000 Saturday for the “capture” of a Florida neighborhood watch captain"...


WOW...Capture...I think the police have a good idea where he is. Now I wonder what those good and benevolet folks at the New Black Panther party would do with Mr. Zimmerman? I remember my history and when the Klan would do this...they didn't need to offer any cash...they would just lynch them. SO where is the outcry from Jessie, Al and The President of ALL of the US? I think the President and his reelection folks want to keep fanning the flames of devision, Whether is it the phony "War on Woman" or now this. I am sure there will be more coming. Lord knows he cannot run on what he as done for the nation. I see this becoming a summer of distraction by the pro Obama forces. The last thing they want is the population at large to think about the looming $5 a gallon gas and the soon to be rising prices, let alone the continued 15% real unemployment and the stagnant housing market. I could only wonder what Je$$ie, Al and the Pre$ident of US, would say if  say the Son's of the KKK offered a similar bounty for the 3 African American men that shot the white student at Mississippi State University last night. The really odd thing is very few news outlets are reporting the story...and even fewer are reporting the races of the suspects. NOW...how in the hell are people supposed to "BOLO" for 3 people when you do not give us any description of the people other than a car... Reminds me of the wild goose chase that was the DC Beltway Sniper...you all remember that...A white guy in a white van....but really it was 2 African Americans in a sedan. Quit being so dam PC and walking on eggshells...the media has no trouble when it comes to ID'ing the suspect when the suspects are white, Asian, or Hispanic...but have a hard time saying...African American. I don't know about you...but when they do not say the race...I assume it is AA because otherwise they would have. 


This is the Washington Post/AP story... it makes no mention of race...
http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/student-shot-to-death-on-mississippi-state-campus-suspects-flee-as-campus-is-put-under-alert/2012/03/25/gIQAkzs9YS_story.html?tid=pm_pop 


Now here is the Ruters...the international news agency based out of London...
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/03/25/us-mississippi-shooting-idUSBRE82O03N20120325  
They are the only one I have found that are reporting the race of the suspects. Since most US based media outlets get there info from the AP...most of America will be in the dark. How is this killing any less important than Treyvon Martin? 

Imagine the "outrage" if 3 white people killed a black student at Grambling....I bet you the media would be saying the race of the suspects in that case...

And that is what is pissing me off...the hypocrisy of the media...and the fact that no one is calling them out on it. Well I am...

Chinese street sweeper...ok...something they have not reverse engineered yet.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2120190/The-Wallace-Gromit-style-road-cleaning-contraption-making-clean-sweep-Chinas-streets.html

I guess we need to ship a street sweeper or 2 to China so the can reverse engeneer one. These are the same people that want to put a man on the moon by 2020 but this is what they come up with to sweep the streets? Really?

3rd grade teacher oblivious to children having sex in her class.

http://houston.cbslocal.com/2012/03/23/teacher-fired-after-not-noticing-third-graders-having-oral-sex-under-desk/

My guess is the teacher was enjoying the show...but what the fuck is wrong with society. When I was in 3rd grade girls were still "icky". I am assuming that both children were of the opposite sex otherwise the teacher would have been championed for "Allowing the children to explore there sexuality." or some such bull shit. And if a teacher misses 2 kids having sex under a desk in class. I am guessing they are missing a shitload more than that every day. But I bet the teacher has tenure and the union will be with them all the way. Just another example of the steady march to Gomorrah.

Well welcome to another place for me to rant, rave, wit and bitch. OR...Facebook with out the friends list. I usually don't hold back there...but I might be even more edgy here. Hell I don't know I think I caved into peer pressure...."Charlie you should have a blog". I am a republican and I am a comic I am a social critic I don't pull punches and I hate hypocrisy . I like a good debate...but don't give me bull shit as facts, I will eviscerate you as soon as you do. I view the MSM as corrupt and question what ever they are running with at the time. I think that people are inherently good...but get led astray buy the BS du jour. You do not have to agree with what I say...but think about what I say. I like making people think. I don't know how active I will be...hell I might get into it...so check in every day...or more...you never know what you will find. Oh and I am new with this blogger.com so it may take me a while to know exactly how I want it to look. Thanks for stopping by and reading this far...now on with the show.